Frustration is something we all experience at times. It is caused by things going out of our favor. You may be trying to manipulate a process that isn’t going well. You want results, and they are taking time. Sometimes people are not helpful, are not listening, or do not understand. All of these situations build pressure in our minds/development.
With the pressure, that level of frustration develops. Therefore, we need to learn to navigate it.
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Understand the Cause
To start, ask yourself: “What is causing my frustration?” There is always a cause – you are tired, you were let down, or the plan did not follow through. When you understand and acknowledge the cause, the clearer you can get a solution becomes.
Do not push that feeling away – stop and listen to it. In many cases, frustration is some form of expression for the fact that you care. You want to change. There is nothing wrong with that. That is human.
Breathe
Breathing is a powerful tool that we usually underutilize. So, when you find yourself frustrated, just stop. Take a deep breath and let it all go. Do it as many times as needed.
You will find your heart rate slows, your mind/brain becomes clearer, and your body feels more grounded. Deep breathing permits your brain the space to reset and realign. Deep breathing provides you time to think before acting.
Walk Away for a Bit
Sometimes, the best solution is to step away. Try walking away from the situation. Go for a walk outside. Drink some water. Sit somewhere quiet and be silent for a while. Listen to some peaceful music.
Any of these little breaks can make the biggest difference. When you return, you are much more likely to feel different, too. You may have more options, and you may be able to speak with less frustration.
Use Simple Words to Talk About Emotions
Frustration gets larger when you do not talk about it. Just talk to someone, and use simple words. “I feel angry because …” or “I am finding this difficult .”.
Talking is helpful. It is not weak. It is wise. Also, it helps people to understand better what you need from them, thus building a better connection.
Engage Your Body
You need to move your body. Physical exercise can help relieve frustration. If you enjoy running, go for a run. If you enjoy stretching, stretch your muscles. Or, if you want to be silly, have a dance party in your room.
Your body stores emotion. Movement helps to release it. You may not resolve the problem in that moment, but you will feel a lot stronger afterwards.
Change Your Perspective
If you can’t change something, then change the focus. Shift to something else for a while. Wash dishes. Water the plants. Clean a desk.
You can regain some control and experience mini-successes. Mini-successes boost self-confidence. Then, when you return to the larger task, you will feel better prepared.
Psychology: Frustration Triggers the Brain’s Fight Response
Psychologists say frustration puts the brain into ‘fight or flight’ mode. This is useful in a life-threatening situation, but it is a hindrance in normal life for most people.
When someone reaches the point of frustration, the brain sees the challenge as a threat and prepares to fight or flee – this is why we shout, ignore, stop talking, or verbalize, etc. It is not a weakness. The brain wants to protect us, and it tries to remove the stressor immediately.
But when we learn to breathe and “hold on for a minute”, we calm that response and show the brain we are safe and okay. This means we can think again.
Write Down Your Thoughts
Writing helps us clarify our thoughts. When you are frustrated about something, get a piece of paper and a pen. Write everything you are thinking about.
There is no “right” word choice. Just write. This action releases some of the mental pressure you are experiencing. You may even identify the real reason for your thoughts and feelings. Writing frees up your mind’s mental capacity a little.
Do not Anticipate Perfection.
Perfection is not alive. Life has difficulties. Life has problems. You plan, and sometimes those plans do not come together. You do things wrong. It is all a part of living.
When you seek a perfectly acceptable outcome, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Accepting a perfect enough outcome allows you to set your expectations. Always remember: progressive is better than perfection. Accepting progress allows you to reduce the amount of stress you have and develop absolute peace.
Psychology: Frustration Comes from Obstructed Goals
One explanation for frustration, according to psychologists, lies in the notion of obstructions to goals. You want to do something, but something is blocking you from reaching that goal, or someone is not letting you reach that goal.
When you consider that blockage, you are stuck in internal conflict. Your brain is thinking one way, saying, “Keep going.” The world is thinking another way, saying, “No, you need to wait.” That disconnection can create emotional heat. This we call obstruction of goals.
To work with frustration, work on breaking the goal down into smaller parts. Change something in the plan to fit the current reality. Try another way of accomplishing the goal. Focus on effort, not just the result. All of this adds reminders of hope to the brain. Hope that calms the frustration.
Laugh a Little
One of the best tools to release your body is laughter. Laughter can change your mood. Watch something funny or talk to someone who makes you laugh.
It may feel silly, but remember, smiling can help. Your brain relates a smile to feelings of happiness. When you are smiling, the brain gets happier. Happy people don’t let frustration take them down for too long. Humor, like many other things, can be a powerful help against frustration.
Get Adequate Sleep
Sometimes we get frustrated because we’re just tired. When we sleep, our brain resets. When we are sleep deprived, problems can feel much bigger than they are.
Be sure you get adequate sleep. Make sure your bedroom is dark and quiet. Don’t use your phone right before bed. You will be able to deal with stress better with a fresh mind.
Learn to Let It Go
Not everything is going to be something you can control. Accept it. Let go of what you can’t fix right now.
This doesn’t mean you give up. This means you make peace. Tell yourself, “I’ll try again tomorrow.” A simple thought like this can turn a frustrating day into a day of calm.
